Practicing Gratitude
24 November 2022
Excerpt from the Book: Finding Peace in Difficult Times, by Dr. Ted P. Asay and Dr. Mark D. Ogletree, 166-170.
We should pray each day for the gift of gratitude. We can ask God to help us see the blessings, gifts, and opportunities that he gives to us. Here are several helpful suggestions to make gratitude an important part of our lives and our family culture:
Keep a gratitude journal.
We can reflect on the blessings we have received and rejoice in God’s goodness in our lives as we prepare for bed each evening. In his research, Dr. Robert Emmons reported that people who regularly kept a gratitude journal and were in the habit of recognizing and expressing gratitude for their blessings reported feeling closer and more connected to people, had better relationships, were more likely to help others, felt less lonely, felt less depressed, slept better, and were more pleasant to be around.”
Think of three to five blessings you have experienced throughout the day or the week and record them in a gratitude journal. Look for blessings from the mundane to the magnificent. Before writing in his gratitude journal, President Henry B. Eyring pondered the following question: “Have I seen the hand of God reaching out to touch us or our children or our family today? Here is a most helpful invitation that we would like you to consider. At the end of each day, respond to these four prompts in your journal:
Write about something funny that happened today
Write about a success that you had
Write about some things you are grateful for
Write about how you saw God’s hand in your life today
As President Henry B. Eyring faithfully kept his gratitude journal, he said, “Something began to happen. As I would cast my mind over the day, I would see evidence of what God had done for one of us that I had not recognized in the busy moments of the day. As that happened, and it happened often, I realized that trying to remember had allowed God to show me what He had done.” This means that some of us would need to begin keeping a journal! It’s never too late to begin a healthy, helpful practice.
Make a Gratitude Visit.
There are people in your life and in the lives of your family members who have made a big difference. Do they know the impact that they have made in your life? Do they realize how you feel about them? Have you thanked them lately? Consider parents, grandparents, friends, teachers, coaches, church leaders, and employers. Stop by their home and share your gratitude with them. Deliver a card or a note from your family. Bring some goodies over. Make a moment of it.
One of the most significant moments that I remember was visiting my mission president before he passed away. I flew from Dallas to Salt Lake City for this visit, and met up with two of my missionary companions. Although our mission president was quite weak from cancer, we spent about an hour with him. Since our missions had concluded 30 years earlier, we had seen the hand of our mission president throughout our lives and wanted him to know of the impact he had us, and, consequently, on our families. We shared our deep feelings, our memories, and other life lessons. Each of us was serving in a bishopric at the time, and we recounted many lessons our mission president taught us about priesthood leadership. We also all had children serving in the mission field and related how the teachings of our mission president had blessed our families. Tears of joy and gratitude were shared freely. It was a moment that none of us will ever forget. Our mission president passed away peacefully several weeks later.
Write a gratitude note or letter.
A note or a letter expressing gratitude is something the recipient can keep and hold onto forever. Sometimes, it may be easier to express something in writing. Moreover, writing something out can be especially beneficial if the recipient lives far away. When I was a missionary, serving in Seattle, Washington in the late 1980s, I broke his pelvis in a freak accident. While I lay in traction in the hospital for a couple of weeks, a kind, older couple from a local ward brought me a tape recorder and some cassette tapes of a man named William Wait. Brother Wait was a popular speaker in the Church back in those days, and his messages were just what the doctor ordered for a missionary in traction. I soaked up all of those sermons that were full of faith, and hope, and optimism, and humor.
Once I was released from the hospital, I went to Deseret Book and purchased some William Wait tapes. I and my companions often listened to those tapes as we drove to our appointments and meetings. Years later, Janie and I were living in Mesa, Arizona, and William Wait was speaking at a fireside at a nearby chapel. Janie and I arrived early, and at Janie’s urging, I was able to approach Brother Wait before the meeting began. I thanked him for his messages on those tapes. I related how those talks brightened my days when everything seemed dark and dreary as I lay in traction at the hospital. Brother Wait was profusely humbled and expressed his gratitude to me—for expressing gratitude.
Years later, I was living in the Dallas area with his family. At my work, I stumbled upon William Wait’s mailing address. Again, I felt compelled to write Brother Wait a letter, expressing gratitude for his life and messages. Weeks later, I received a hand written message from Brother Wait, thanking me again, for expressing thanks. Two weeks later, Brother Wait passed away. I have always been grateful that I expressed appreciation and gratitude to a man who made a big difference in my life.
Expressing Prayers of Gratitude.
How often do we express gratitude in our prayers? Do we engage in that practice quickly, so we can get to the point of telling our Father in Heaven what we need? When was the last time you offered only a prayer of gratitude? Heavenly Father must love it when his children do not ask for anything, but only express thanks, love, and appreciation. Elder Richard G. Scott taught, “I have saved the most important part about prayer until the end. It is gratitude. Our sincere efforts to thank our beloved Father generate wondrous feelings of peace, self-worth, and love. No matter how challenging our circumstances, honest appreciation fills our mind to overflowing with gratitude.” The expression of gratitude causes us to feel even more gratitude.
Teach your children to be grateful.
In our present world of selfishness and busyness, fewer and fewer children are taught the principle of gratitude. Often, parents give children in the neighborhood rides to and from school, to practices, recitals, and even Church meetings. Too often, such children never express thanks for the ride, or for kindnesses shown to them. Children receive Christmas gifts and birthday presents, and never write “thank-you” notes to those who provided them with gifts. It becomes obvious that many children are not taught to express thanks—since they do not offer any. Teach your children to always express gratitude when someone does something for them. Encourage them to express gratitude in their prayers for their bounteous blessings, and to always express kindness, love, and appreciation for those who do kind things for them.
As we focus on our blessings, our circumstances, our faith, our families, and the gospel of Jesus Christ, we recognize that many are abundantly blessed. By recognizing our bounteous blessings, and by expressing gratitude to others and to our Father in Heaven, our stress and anxiety dissipate, and peace will enter our souls and calm our troubled hearts. Sit down today and make a list of each blessing you have. In fact, “Count your blessings; name them one by one…Count your many blessings; See what God hath done.”